Child custody and holidays

Holidays can be the best of times or the worst of times; and during a separation or after a divorce, the unique issues that face parents dealing with child custody tend to come to a head.  Family traditions are important and navigating how to structure new traditions can be difficult.  Where should a child wake up on Christmas Day?  Should that be alternated each year?  How can travel out of town during the holidays be accommodated and still allow the other parent time to spend with children near special days?  If one parent had Thanksgiving, who should get the next holiday?  Can the exact day be shared comparably?  These are questions that separated/divorced parents have to figure out.  Some can do it on their own; some can do it with the help of a co-parenting counselor; some need the assistance of attorneys or mediators; some will try to have a Court decide.  Our children grow up quickly; and the times of wide-eyed surprise on Christmas morning can vanish in a blink if parents are stuck in litigation and waiting for others to make the decisions for them.  Try to work out the holidays, look at how you can set the example for your children in making days and seasons special for them.  Understand that if you need professionals to help, advance discussions are important so that the plans can be made well ahead of time and the season/day itself can be focused on being together, celebrating, loving, and creating good memories.  Happy Holidays to all of our clients, colleagues, readers, and friends.