IMPORTANT INFORMATION IF YOU TRAVEL WITH CHILDREN

Traveling with children for many families is a normal occurrence.  Trips to Disney World, trips to visit family in California or another state, trips for sports teams are among the common destinations.  In addition, our communities are comprised of many international families who seek to travel abroad to visit extended family or to expose their children to other parts of their heritage; and many families seek to travel internationally to introduce children to the vast array of cultural cities. 

Passport requirements for children must be met and they may take longer if families are separated, divorced, or other engaged in custody disputes.  The State Department has a wonderful website that provides significant information about international travel with children.  Plan ahead, plan early and check out their site at lhttp://travel.state.gov/passport/get/minors/minors_834.html

Protect Your Confidences

Protect your confidences

Meeting with your bible study group at a local coffee spot?  Talking with your counselor over a latte?  Be careful!  It is wonderful to have these types of resources available to help you through life's difficult moments, especially if you are dealing with separation, ,divorce, custody matters, etc.   However, be sensitive to the fact that your confidentiality in a public place where you can be seen and heard may be limited.  Do you know who is sitting at the table behind you?  Who is in line while you wait for your bagel and java?  If you knew that your spouse's divorce lawyer was enjoying breakfast just feet away, would your conversation change?  If it would, then you may not want to share those parts of life in those contexts.  We encourage our clients to have support systems in place, but choose carefully when and where you want to rely on them.

School Enrollment

School is about to begin; and students are starting to get their supplies, find out their teachers, and prepare for classes.

Parents who are in the process of separating or divorcing need to be mindful of the requirements of Virginia law regarding where a child can attend school.

If a parent moves out of a child’s school district, and that parent has custody of the child, the child has to change districts.  Agreement of the parents does not allow a deviation from this rule; courts do not have authority to deviate from this rule.

Therefore, if you are a parent who will have custody of a school aged child, you need to know what school districts are applicable if you choose to reside some where other than the marital residence.

Become Financially Knowledgeable

In follow up to our post last week, we remind you that it is important to be informed about finances.  You have the ability to get some documents yourself to get a start on the gathering process. If an account is a joint account, the institution in which the account is held should provide you with copies of statements for such joint accounts.  You may have to make the request in writing; you may have to go to a branch and provide identification; but you should be able to get the information.

Tax returns contain significant insight into a marriage’s financial picture.  If they are filed jointly, then you should be able to get a copy of it.  You may need to go to the IRS; you may need to complete paperwork such as Form 4506; and it may take some time, but you should be able to obtain the information.

Knowledge is an important step; it leads to informed decision making; and informed decision making is the backbone of any negotiations and/or litigation. 

Basic Estate Planning After Divorce

Recently, cases have been issued by the United States Supreme Court and the Virginia appellate courts addressing what happens when the parties’ divorce, a court order or agreement does not require the ex-spouse to be maintained as a beneciary of life insurance or retirement, but alas the spouse dies without changing his/her beneficiary from the ex-spouse.

It is important after a divorce to take steps to protect yourself in the event of your death.  Some steps include but are not limited to: (1) make sure your will is updated; (2) determine who you want to make health decisions and other decisions for you and review your advanced health care  directive and power of attorney accordingly; (3) update your HIPPA forms with your providers; (4) be sure all beneficiary designations and POD accounts have been changed.

Due Diligence and Knowledge Based Decision Making

Part of the separation and divorce process has to do with finances: spousal support, child support, distribution of assets and/or liabilites.   Some couples have shared information and decision making about finances during the marriage; they know each other’s income, they know the overall marital estate, they have equal access to financial documents.  Other couples allow one person to be in charge of the finances, to file the tax returns, to balance the checkbooks, and to make the investment/savings decisions.  Access to information is usually limited to that one spouse.

In trying to decide how to approach a separation, what steps to take to protect objectives, how to negotiate or even how to litigate, knowing the financial estate is key.

If you are the spouse who does not have the financial knowledge of the marriage, then you need to feel comfortable asking for the financial information (which can be done by your lawyer as well).  How can you know what you are gaining or what you are waiving without that information?

Making informed decisions is important as part of a separation.  Divorce is emotional; but emotions cannot cloud having all the information on which to base a decision.  Once an agreement is signed or once a court makes a determination, the terms are set; wishing or wondering if you missed something because you were scared to ask or you felt badly about wanting the separation so you didn’t ask is not an emotion you want to experience.

Lawyers are used to asking and are used to having their clients be asked; it is a normal and important part of the process. 

Tangible Personal Property

Throughout a marriage, couples can acquire many things: furniture, tvs, kitchenware, linens, jewelry, paintings, family photos, etc.  Some times these items serve a very functional purpose; other times they are sentimental parts of a marriage and family life.  Some items have monetary value and some items have no monetary value.  When a divorce or separation occurs, how are these assets handled?

First, from a practical standpoint, it is important to preserve the items whether by having possession of it or by making a photo/video log of it.  Second, for each item, how was it acquired: by gift from a spouse, by gift from a third party, as a purchase during the marriage, through an inheritance?  Third, what is its monetary value?  Remember, value is normally  assigned as of the date of the hearing/agreement.  It is not the value as of the date of acquisition; it is not the replacement value.  It is valued at yard sale or Craig’s list value unless you have an appraisal done that assigns it another value.

Personal property can be a last battleground; and it can be an expensive one.  It is filled with emotion.  However, it can be resolved.  Be careful how you choose to fight this battle; and consult with a family law attorney when assistance is needed.